"It's not you... it's me..."

"... or maybe it is you, I'm just not sure. I'm not sure about anything anymore... (sigh) I do know that I just don't feel about you the way I used to. I mean, at first things were great, and things were really clicking for us, you know? I looked forward to our time together each day... it just felt so right, you know? But now it all feels so... so forced. I'm not enjoying our time together and I feel kind of like you're trying to run my life. Maybe it's time to put some distance between us. And, in the interest of honesty, I feel like I must tell you that I'm looking for someone else. Someone who can really give me what I need, because time is of the essence here. I mean, it's almost March! (sigh) You know what, though? I'll recommend you to someone! You just might be perfect for someone else! It would be best for both of you! It's all for the best..."

Sadly, this conversation is taking place in homeschooling homes everywhere right now. Not between wives and husbands (at least I hope not!) but it's what homeschool moms are saying to their curriculum!

Here we are in February... the month of "love" but also a month commonly marked by the winter blah's, the "February Funk." School feels more challenging, not quite as exciting as it was in the fall. It's harder to get our kids motivated. Then, right in the midst of our boredom and discontent, arriving in our mailboxes just like a Valentine's card... the curriculum catalogs. Our email boxes may deliver news of curriculum sales, and we may be tempted to "stray." We read on blogs and message boards the romantic stories of others and their wonderful relationships with their curriculum, and we think, "Is there something I'm missing???" We want that "spice" back in our school!

Here's what I'm telling myself: Hold on! Stick with it, make it work. (For me it's a stewardship issue- the equivalent of "throwing money at the problem.") Tweak what you have to tweak, let go of what you need to, but try to use what you bought back in August (or before) for this year. I'm trying not to get "wooed" by some new, handsome curriculum that I have no chance of finishing by May anyway, and might not be the solution that I think it is. (In fact, I'm starting to think the problem is not the curriculum after all... maybe it's me! ::gasp::)

So, I'm sticking with my commitment. I'm staying faithful. I'm going to find a way to make it work. I'm going to save the money I would've spent "divorcing" my current curriculum so I'll have it for the big homeschool book fair in May.

And maybe then I'll find true love... :::sigh:::